Sticks and Stones
Do you remember this saying from childhood: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me!” While this line may have helped sooth our hurt feelings and defend us against verbal bullies when we were teased or taunted as children, it is actually not true. Words can have a powerful positive or negative affect on our personalities. The things that we hear repeatedly, whether from others or through self-talk, will over time shape our self-image and alter our self-esteem.
A friend of mine brought me the sayings from a number of fortune cookies recently after she had been to dinner with fellow community hand bell choir members. One of those “fortunes” was the inspiration for this blog entry: “Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echos are truly endless.” While this is so very true, it has been my experience as a chaplain and minister for over twenty-five years that unkind words seem to come far to easily. How often in a day do we allow ourselves to make unkind, or even cruel, remarks to others or about others? Cynicism and anger have become major attitudes among young and old alike. Instead of looking for, and expecting, the best from situations, others, and even ourselves, we instead more closely resemble this character.
God’s word in the Holy Bible also addresses this issue. In the third chapter of the Book of James in the New Testament, the author uses an illustration that every towboater can appreciate. He talks about how a large ship is steered by a relatively small rudder. Every river mariner knows that without propulsion and steering the boat is just another barge! James likens the human tongue – our words – as having that same kind of ability to steer our lives and the lives of others. In James 3:10 there is this wonderful verse: “Out of the same mouth comes blessing and cursing. This ought not be happening” (my paraphrase).
What kinds of things are you saying about others? Are you building people up or tearing them down? I was on a boat today where the captain was enthusiastic and vibrant, and the whole crew was obviously feeding off that vibe. Whenever a crew is together for extended periods of time, there will naturally be differences or even conflict. Can we resolve to find ways to deal with these issues without resorting to verbal warfare?
What kind of things are you saying to yourself about yourself? Are you more tolerant and forgiving of others than of yourself? None of us is perfect…yes…not even you!!! Do you put yourself down or build yourself up? We need to be honest about our strengths and areas where we can improve…but we do not need to belittle and berate ourselves. We are all children of God and deserving of abundant life. Abundant life is life lived to the fullest…from A to Z! Living live abundantly will put a big smile on your face faster than a trip to Wal-Mart!!
What kinds of words are you sending echoing down through the corridors of life? Are you seen as a positive person…a problem-solver…a team player? The words we speak about others and about ourselves will be part of our legacy in this world. I hope and pray that each of us will take the high road and help to make this world a better place, beginning in our own lives…our own familes…our own boats…and watching the good spread!!
See you on the river!
Chaplain Mike
Posted: October 13th, 2009 under Towboaters.
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